Bicarbonate and ACV hair care

I'm doing something new with my dreads.  I love my organic soaps and all, but it's been leaving my hair greasy.  Regular shampoos just won't cut it.  They leave too much residue on the hair, which is bad news for dreads.  I need something that will leave the hair clean and oil and residue-free.

There's been this whole big revolution of people going "no-poo".  Some people choose to stop using shampoo and only use conditioner.  Others just wash their hair with water, nothing more.  There are those who opt for regular bar soaps, organic soaps, or Dr. Bronner's.  I've heard that you can use Dawn dish soap to wash their hair.  There is recipe upon recipe online.  From ingredient checkers to recipe makers to those who simply listen to what some online source tells them, people everywhere are starting to look into alternatives to the shampoo revolution, and for various reasons from cost to health.

In my case, I've started on this whole journey with dreads.  I know from listening to the experiences others have had that it's easy to screw up dreads, as much as it looks like an easy, no-brainer of a process.  Yes, it's a wash and wear hair style, but if you think about it, bound up clumps of hair can easily be damaged or destroyed.  Think about any fiber that gets wet and stays wet for long periods of time.  Moisture builds up inside and it can easily mildew or mold.  It develops a lovely musty smell.  That's just one of the many ways things can go wrong with dreads.  Because of this, you'll want to be careful what you're putting in your hair.

I'm sure you wouldn't believe it, but I've heard all kinds of stories of things people put in their hair to help their hair dread.  The two most disturbing on the commonly used list are honey and tooth paste.  I can't imagine anyone thinking it would be a good idea to put honey in their hair.  For me, that just sounds like a sticky, messy disaster that would leave the hair in a great position to rot if I didn't wash it all out.  Nope, that doesn't sound like fun at all!  Toothpaste actually has much the same effect from what I've heard.  Both of these do nothing to the dreading process, aside from perhaps destroying the hair, which is not at all the intended effect.  There's this huge debate going on about wax as well, given that if used while the hair is wet, it traps in the moisture, encouraging rot and bad smells.  Wax also tends to attract dirt, so you've got to be careful how much wax you use.  Now, I've known a lot of people who have used wax and have had their dreads turn out just fine, so I'm not one of the "evils of wax" kind of people, but I choose not to use it for a variety of reasons.  One of which is the number of nightmare stories of "wax gone wrong" and people trying to get the wax out.  The anti-wax playing field got to me long before the wax side did, and even with the research, I think wax-free is the way for me.  There's too much room to mess it up with wax!  It's easier to put my woolies back in without wax to mess them up too.  Of course, just as the hair stops bleeding out dye so I could put the woolies back in, the weather turns and it's almost too hot for wool!

I wanted something that would be easy and inexpensive. Organic soaps can be pricey.  Dr. Bronner's is great for washing everything under the sun, but it seems several people find that it leaves a residue on their dreads.  I just didn't want to take the risk.  Straight from the start I decided I wanted to go with a home-made rinse, but I didn't think I could because my hair wasn't long enough for a soak.  It's hard to sit with your dreads in a bowl soaking when half your dreads are too short to reach the bowl!  However, I finally decided I had no choice!  I had to do something.

There are dozens of "no-poo" recipes out there.  Most of them contain the same major components, bicarbonate (otherwise known as baking soda) and ACV (apple cider vinegar).  Some of them include additives like tea tee oil, lavender oil, and lemon juice.  For your typical non-dreadie, the easiest recommended recipe is a tablespoon or two of bicarbonate mixed with just enough water to make a paste.  Once that paste is formed, you scrub it in to the roots of your hair just as you would a normal shampoo.  Rinse, and then soak the hair in a mix of one or two teaspoons of ACV mixed with water.  Rinse until the vinegar smell is gone.  Simple as that and done!

For someone with dreads, there's all of these different recipes.  The one thing I'm finding common among all of them are between two and four teaspoons of bicarbonate and between two teaspoons and a quarter cup of ACV mixed in a bowl with about four cups of water.  To this is often added some lemon juice (about the amount of one full squeezed lemon), or a few drops of some kind of oil.  Some even add a bit of sea salt.  You soak the hair, leave it for a half an hour, then rinse until clean.  Until recently I hadn't heard the whole idea of pouring it into and over your hair until soaked and wrapping it in a towel for a half an hour.  That's something I can much easier manage in my daily life.  Soaking my hair is much harder to do with it being so short.  It would mean pouring water from the bowl I soak in with a cup to soak the rest of it.  It might take some creativity.

Not wanting to go with anything fancy, I just used the bicarbonate and ACV.  I mixed them, soaked them for a short period, probably about ten minutes, and rinsed.  My hair felt shockingly dry, and clean!  I wasn't sure I got all of the vinegar out of my hair the first time, so I rinsed my hair again when I showered today to be sure.  Now that my hair is dry, I absolutely love the way my hair is starting to look now!  I have to admit, I was a little scared because the knots started coming loose!  Half of what was there came out, but what didn't is pretty solidly locked up!  I think it's the greasiness of the hair that caused them to slip loose when being washed out.  I went back and redid anything that was too loose and they seem to be staying fairly well.

My hair is kind of dry, but I think that's either a need to tweak the recipe or I need to let my hair adjust to the new system.  We'll see what happens from here, but the dreads are turning out great!  The new wash seems to really be working!

One Month Old Dreadies!

My dreads just recently turned one month old.  It feels like I've had them so much longer than that!  It's like my hair has always been in dreads.  Yes, I had he woolies for a while.  Before that I had braids.  Still, in between I had bouts of "normal hair".  It's not like I just jumped from one to the next.  I'm pretty excited about it all!

I have to admit, a part of me wants to get this first year over with.  I want my dreads to be  mature, to do what they're going to do.  I don't want to have that awkward "grow out hair" phase.  It's just like short hair transitioning to long.  There's this awkward grow out period where no matter what you do, it doesn't look right.  The same thing seems to happen with dreads, only they do all kinds of funky things, like shrink, twist, get little loops and all kinds of craziness.  It's an interesting journey.

I've come to learn that dreads have their own personalities.  Each one develops it's own sense of style.  Some of mine are crazy twisty, almost seeming more braided than dreading.  Some of them are really super solid already.  Some of them are soft and squishy, which probably means they'll have a lot of tightening up to do.  They all want to flip around their own ways and lay the way they want to.  It's like my hair, now that it's sectioned and started, knows exactly what it wants to do!

Today's Wisdom Card reads, "This year I do the mental work for positive change."  That sounds pretty accurate.  "My motto this year is: 'I go for the joy!' Life is here for me to enjoy today."  I think I've seen this one before.  However, it kind of goes with what I've been experiencing today.  Screw the nay-sayers!  I'm going to be happy because I can!

Today's I Can Do It Card: "Love is powerful - your love and my love.  Love brings us peace on Earth."  On the reverse it says, "Love is all there is!"  Maybe I need to start focusing on where the love in my life is coming from.  That's where I'm going to find my peace within!

Exhaustion and the Reset Button

I think my baby is trying to give me a message.  For the past few weeks he's made it difficult to sleep in my own bed.  He seems to want to sleep in a room alone.  The moment anyone else enters, he's awake.  This means if I sleep on the couch, I'm fine.  If I try to sleep in my bed, I end up spending the whole night up trying to get him back to sleep.  It's been rough on all of us.

Last night things kind of got to the point where no one could really deal with it.  Thankfully the older kids were able to sleep through it, but the little one woke up and did nothing but scream no matter what we did for two hours!  By the time we finally did get him to sleep, my partner and I were arguing because we were both so tired, stressed, and exhausted.  It got to the point where he stormed out, waking up the baby again, and I finally gave up and got out of bed to start looking for work.  I was half convinced he wasn't going to come back when he finally came in.  We talked things out briefly, and I went to bed.

I have to say, sleep was more blissful than any I've had in a while.  I only got a couple of hours, but it was better than nothing.  I was sent back to bed for a nap because I needed one, but I couldn't really sleep for more than a few minutes at a time with my partner being on the phone with his dad and later his mom.  We've figured out what part of his problem finding a job.  His mom messed up his credit pretty severely, so I couldn't just relax while he was talking that out with her.  It's probably for the best since it would completely mess up my sleep cycle again.

I think I have to thank my little baby boy.  He's really setting the reset button on my sleep patterns.  I'm so exhausted that I could probably sleep if I went to bed right now.  I'm not going to because it's still a bit early for that.  If I start that pattern I'm never going to be able to stay up for dance classes, but at least I know when I go to bed, I'll actually be tired and I might just find a way to sleep.

Today's Wisdom Card?  "There is a solution to every problem."  Yeah, I've had to keep reminding myself of this one.  "We create habits and problems to fulfill a need.  When I can find a positive way to fill the need, I can release the problem."  I honestly think I need to start looking at some of the needs in my life that are causing problems.  I need to reassess how I handle those needs.  For example, my biggest problem is the sleep thing.  I have a need for my mind to be active so I can handle everything I have on my plate.  Unfortunately, not sleeping is creating more of a problem in itself.   I need to remind myself that being well rested is the best way I can help myself think my way through the other list of problems I'm having right now.

Today's I Can Do It Card reads, "The joy I find in my career is reflected in my overall happiness."  I suppose that one is an interesting statement right now!  I'm not sure how much joy I'm feeling in my career!  "I have unlimited potential.  Only good lies before me."  Okay, this one I need to post to every surface I look at regularly.  That way I can remind myself of it all the time!

Found the Source of the Guilt

Thanks to my friend Sarah, I've figured out the source of that guilt my card was referencing yesterday!  Thank you, Sarah!  I never would have figured it out on my own!

Lately I've felt like I've been failing everyone.  I didn't really put much stock into that as guilt.  I bailed on the duet piece for our show because I just didn't have the time, energy, and ability to rehearse it enough.  I've been feeling like I've failed my kids in not being more available to them.  Most of all, I feel like I've been failing as a dancer and as a business woman.  I put a lot of pressure on myself on a daily basis.  It's hard to live up to my own standards! I set the bar pretty high!  I need to recognize the need to pace myself.  Rome wasn't built in a day and my business will certainly be the same way!  The same can go for just about everything else in my life!

I've put some consideration into what I need to bring myself back into balance.  The first thing might seem backwards.  I think I need to dance less.  I know, when it comes to making my goals and becoming a better dancer, that implies I need to dance more, but in truth, I think I'll come back to that if I can take a breather from dance.  It's not just dancing less.  It's also a matter of the quality of my dance time.  If I'm spending a lot of time either really expanding myself as a dancer I think I'll enjoy it more.  Yes, I need to increase my stamina, so pushing myself out for longer periods of time is ideal, but with that focus just the idea of dance is unappealing.  I think perhaps I need to seriously consider how much I'm teaching as well.  Teaching may just be killing my love for the fun and art of it.  Maybe I need to focus on the dance classes that are really bringing me something positive for my time.

Another thing I need to do is bake more.  I know baked goods aren't exactly great for keeping a healthy diet, but with how thin everyone in my family is, I can't say as I'm too worried about that.  My kids are always pushing the boarder of "underweight" for their height.  I know I'm underweight, not based on my BMI, which would have me weighing about 130, but for the weight my doctor in mass said seemed like an ideal weight for me back in Mass, somewhere around 120-125.  Even my wonderful partner doesn't weigh all that much, though he's considered "healthy weight".  So, ignoring the health side of baked goods, I really love to bake.  Cookies, breads, pretty much anything.  Today I took a moment to mix up some coffee cake.  The idea was it would be cool and ready for the kids to have for breakfast in the morning.  I might just have some of it as a snack before bed.  Baking always seems to put me in a better mood!  I think I would have loved it in my mom's situation where we would have to do bake sales for our Catholic School's fund raisers.  I'd be interested in doing baked goods at some of my dance events too, but I think that would be too much of a hassle, and might put too much pressure on the need to bake, taking all of the fun out of it.

To top it all off, I'm taking a note from Alice in Wonderland.  I've picked up the books and begun reading again.  One thing I've noticed about Alice, she never once stopped to question anything.  For example, she never thought it so very odd to hear a rabbit speaking, nor did she find it odd that he pulled a pocket watch from his waistcoat pocket, even though rabbits don't talk, nor do they have waistcoats or pocket watches.  She never thought it very strange to think of potions to make her grow or think.  She never thought much of talking chess pieces or flowers either.  To her, even the strangest thing was somehow a plain and simple reality.  There was no need to look further than the surface.  It simply happened, was what it was, and that was all.  Everything to Alice was taken at face value, if it were to have any value at all.  Many of the things she believes without so much as a question are things the adult world tells us are impossible, but she takes them as exactly what they are.  She never questions any of it.  She also always knows exactly who she is in reference to everyone else at all times.  The more I read of her, the more I think of her as someone I should aspire to be more like again!  I used to be at one point in time, but I guess I've kind of grown beyond it as I've gotten wounded by the world around me.  It's time to open myself up to that youthful trust that the world is exactly as it should be.  Besides, Alice, much like me, is far more harsh on herself than anyone else could ever be.  I think I need a little more of her in my life!

Today's Wisdom Card came up once before already.  I think this time it's working more in line with how I feel right now.  "I am willing to see my magnificence."  While I don't completely feel I believe that right now, I'm starting to see a little glimmer of that in my life.  It's like the more I hear it, the more I want to believe it.  "If I think that I am a bad person, I get a negative feeling.  However, if I change the thought, the feeling disappears."  I'm not feeling those negative feelings I have disappear yet, but with each day I'm noticing my negative feelings are being more often replaced with the positive!

Today's I Can Do It Card is a very appropriate message for me to read myself!  "I get plenty of sleep every night.  My body appreciates how I take care of it."  I read that and wanted to laugh because I know it's untrue, but I needed to hear that!  I just need to keep telling myself that!  Perhaps that will help me get to sleep at a decent hour every night!  "I lovingly do everything I can to assist my body in maintaining perfect health."  This was read while munching on a piece of coffee cake, probably not the healthiest thing for me.  However, I need these reminders to myself.  Positive affirmations can change a person's entire mentality towards the world around them!  I just need to keep encouraging myself to stay positive.

I've had a few people ask me what the point of these card readings are.  Well, I'm just using them to try and foster a more positive attitude in myself.  This is a great experiment to see if using these cards over a period of time, a month, for example, yields any results.  If it does, I might just have to stick with them and encourage others to do the same!  If it doesn't, it's not like I spent money on the cards, as they were a gift. and it didn't take much time out of my day, so there's really no loss there.  I'll pass them on to someone who may more positively benefit from them.

Tired, Cold, and Feeling Down

Yeah, it's one of those days again.  I'm feeling kind of exhausted.  Financial situation is starting to wear me down.  In general, I'm feeling like the struggle is finally wearing me down.  I've always been a fighter, but now I wonder if I should just give up and give in, follow the flow of my life and just stop trying.

I decided to take a break from anything requiring too much brain today.  I was watching Gothic Bellydance Revelations.  I have to say, some of it was Gothic bellydance, but a lot of it was just bellydance in appropriate colors, or very thematic, theatrical dance that was neither Goth nor bellydance.  It was still good, but I found myself to be, well, more than a little disappointed by the whole thing.  I had really hoped I would see more actual Gothic bellydance.  I guess I found myself letting that set the tone for the day a bit too.

Honestly, I'm just getting exhausted and run down.  I think I may just need to take a few days to do nothing but relax, though I know that's not going to happen.  Maybe I can just get to bed early tonight and that will help.  Anything is worth a try.

Today's Wisdom Card: "I forgive myself for any wrongdoing."  "Guilt never makes anyone feel better, nor does it change a situation.  I now stop feeling guilty.  I let myself out of that prison."  Somehow I don't see how that applies right now as I don't feel guilty about anything, but it's always a good life lesson.  It's a good reminder for a time when I may burden myself with guilt!  Right now all I'm burdening myself with is exhaustion!  I don't even feel guilty about that!  It would take too much energy!

Today's I Can Do It Card: "Money is a state of mind that supports me.  I allow prosperity to enter my life on a higher level than before."  "The Law of Attraction brings only good into my life."  This, however, does sound like a message I really need in my life right.  Money has been too much of a stress.  Instead, I need to change my perspective to bring only the best things into my life!

Checking Coordinents

I'm finally getting back on track fitness-wise.  I'm noticing my stamina isn't at all what it used to be, but I'm starting to get back on track.  I'm starting to focus not so much on moving in general, but more on the movements themselves.  It's been a refreshing change.  I guess sometimes we focus so much on the act of doing that we stop to think about what we're doing, or how!  Or more importantly, why!

I've become so lost on the act of doing, keep moving, keep moving, that I forget about what needs to be done.  I have to do and do and do.  Maybe instead of running aimlessly into the woods, maybe I should stop and check my map and compass to figure out where I'm going.  It doesn't make sense to wander aimlessly and hope to get somewhere.

My life needs direction.  Things have started falling into place, so now I can stop and breathe a little bit.  I can take some time to refocus and find my direction.  It's time I start to take advantage of this moment of peace I have, even if it's not going to last for long!

Life is crazy and chaotic, but it's finding these moments of peace in all the chaos that really mean something.  It's time my life starts to get back on track.  I've got some time for it now, so I'm going to do the best I can!

Today's Wisdom Card?  "This world is our heaven on Earth."  "In the new millennium of the Aquarian Age, we are learning to go within to find our savior.  We are the power we are looking for.  Each one of us is totally linked with the Universe and with Life."  This message, as long as it is, really was perfect for me.  I'm really feeling it today.  This world really is my heaven on Earth, if I choose to make it that way.  I need to recognize that, "I am the change I wish to see in the world."  I need to live my life the way I see the world and my world will come along to join it.

On the I Can Do It Card?  "I direct my creative talents toward music, art, dance, writing - anything that gives me pleasure."  "I am learning to be more creative every day."  Yup, maybe that's a hint.  I've kind of been running away from art and focusing on business.  Honestly, it's time to change pace a bit.

Working my Way towards Health

I'm starting a new daily practice.  I'm going to take some time each day to meditate on my chakras.  I need to restore the energy flow in my body, and get back to what I consider normal, preferably better than normal.  I need to find some sense of balance in my life again.  My chakra points have shown themselves to be in all sorts of disarray, which could totally explain why I feel so out of whack.

My life really needs a better sense of direction, and a better sense of peace.  I can only hope that by taking on regular routines, like meditation, it will help me find better balance with myself.  I can start to feel more comfortable in my own body again.

Today's Wisdom Card tells me, "This year I do the mental work for positive change."  The other side it reads, "My motto this year is: 'I go for the joy!'  Life is here for me to enjoy today."  Yes, again, that sounds like my message for the year!  I'd already made my decision to do the mental work for positive change.  It's that positive decision for change that allows me to truly live, and it's going to be a more enjoyable life if I try and work towards the positive.

For today my I Can Do It Card says, "I am in the process of making positive changes in all areas of my life."  The reverse states, "I have the strength to stay calm in the face of change."  This connects so well with things that I've been thinking in my life.  I've been facing a lot of changes, and it's been bringing me a lot of anxiety.  I need to remember that these changes are good and embrace them!

Another Week Down, Sickness, and Staying Positive

So, my dreads are now three weeks old!  It feels like it's been so much longer than that.  The dreads are so natural and comfortable that I feel like I've had them forever!  It's hard to believe it's just been such a short while!  I have to wonder why I didn't do this sooner.

I've been feeling under the weather today.  I'm not sure if it's stress or something I ate, but my stomach hasn't been too happy with me.  I'm almost willing to bet stress is a large part of it.  I'm trying to accept that this is all just trying to teach me a lesson.  I have something to learn in all of this.  Maybe this is trying to tell me to stop trying so hard, kick back, and relax!

So, I'm pulling cards again in hopes of staying positive.  Today's Wisdom Card reads, "I am willing to see my magnificence".  The back says, "If I think that I am a bad person, I get a negative feeling.  However, if I change the thought, the feeling disappears."

That has so much meaning for my day today.  I've been feeling ill, frustrated, and in general just wanted to give up on everything I've been trying so hard for.  I need to start looking at myself for what I am and what I'm capable of.  More importantly, I need to recognize that not all of these troubles are my fault.  In some cases, like my partner's ability to hold a job, it's got nothing to do with me.  Maybe I need to pick up and take control of my life.  It could just mean I need to be more supportive of the people who effect my life so we can be at more of a balance.

Today's I Can Do It Card kind of echoes that statement.  One one side is written, "I cannot change another person.  I let others be who they are, and I simply love who I am."  The other side bears, "I get the help I need, when I need it, from various sources.  My support system is strong and loving."  That sounds like what my friends have been telling me all week!

You know, as much as I'm skeptical about cards like these, I have to say, they're proving just how well on target they are.  It's possible this is all chance, but I'm not inclined to believe it is.  There's just something about how fitting it really is...

Positive Affirmations

I've decided to try something new today.  Everything has been kind of getting me down.  I know the weather's part of it.  How could it not be?  When everything's gray and cold outside it makes it very difficult to think positive.  It's hard to focus on the light when everything surrounding you is so dark and miserable.

In truth, when there's snow, I kind of feel happy.  There's something beautiful about watching the little white puffs fall from the sky.  Back home it was usually big wet puffs, not little flakes like everyone imagines.  Snow made me tired, but it always made me smile.  If we had snow, I would probably be much happier, but instead we just have this gray waste.

I've been toying with the idea of giving myself positive affirmations to work with.  My friend at Otherwise Quite Good gave  me some Wisdom Cards that I thought I'd check out.  I had figured they would be more like oracle cards or something, but in truth they were just a box full of positive affirmations.  On the front side is the phrase.  On the back is the meditation topic that goes with that phrase.  I think I'm going to pull one card every day for the next few months, see what that holds for me.

Today's card reads, "Each person is part of the harmonious whole."  The back reads, "I choose to believe that 'everyone is always helpful.'  Therefore, wherever I go in life, people are there to help me."  I really do feel like this is a good meditation point for me.  All too often I find myself focusing on having to do it all myself.  I need to learn when delegation is appropriate, and I need to learn when to ask for help.  If I ask for help, I likely won't be disappointed!  Sometimes asking for help is all it really takes!  I know my friends are good, helpful, mostly positive people.  They've done so much for me in the past.  In truth, if I need help and support, I'm sure I can count on them!  It's easier to take on the challenges in my life knowing that my friends aren't going to let me fall.

I've also started toying with another set of her cards.  The name sounds kind of cheesy.  They're called I Can Do It Cards, but the idea is also appealing.  Again, the idea is for regular, positive affirmations to change our mental patterns.  The whole concept of "mind over matter" really works more than many people would like to believe, and the power of positive thinking truly does have an effect.  Changing your perspective can drastically change your life, even if it's just by changing your own mental outlook.

Today's card reads "When I wake up in the morning, I plan for a good day.  My anticipation attracts good experiences to me."  The reverse states, "Everyone I encounter at work today has my best interests at heart."  I have to say, a part of me wants to rebel against that second statement.  I know there are a lot of people in the world that don't have my best interest at heart, but if I approach the world with that in mind, I'll be constantly looking for people to hurt me, which means my perception would show that even accidental situations were deliberate.  I would be guarded and might miss out on some wonderful opportunities.

That isn't to say that intuition or knowledge should be ignored.  Chances are if that woman who always tries to make your life miserable starts causing conflict for you, she's not doing it with your best interest at heart.  However, know that most other people in the world are good, positive people.  By greeting them with the openness of someone who believes they truly have your best interests at heart, you'll be more likely to listen to what they have to share and learn from their experiences.  Perhaps opportunities will be presented that weren't otherwise going to be available.  The world becomes a very different place.

The world is dark enough.  We don't need more negativity to muck it up even more.  Instead we need to change the face of the world around us with love, a positive outlook, and doing things to better the world around us.

Winter Blahs

Winter used to be my favorite season, but recently it's also been one of those seasons that makes me feel, well, pretty blah.  Part of it is missing the weather back home.  I know everyone in Mass is piled under mountains of snow right now, but I'd prefer that to this frozen, snowless place.  I actually like snow, as much of a hassle as it can be.  There's something refreshing about a snow storm, and seeing the dead earth frosted over with white.  You just don't get that in Texas!

Because of the cold temperatures we've been having, I haven't had much of a chance to go outside and get some fresh air in the past couple of days.  My classes yesterday were canceled as the store closed early.  Tonight they may be canceled because of the blackouts hitting across town.  That makes it kind of difficult to get outside and do pretty much anything.  Being cooped up makes me even more depressed and crazy, so what's a girl to do?

Today I'm determined to beat the winter blahs.  I'm going to kick back with good food, some hot chocolate, or maybe some tea, and watch some videos for work related stuff.  I might even do something crazy like play the Wii.  It's a great chance to play Twilight Princess or Final Fantasy: Crystal Bearers.  I know, it's not exactly good for me stuff, but I find the puzzles pretty engaging.  That's one thing I love about games on the Wii.  Then there's always sudoku on Brain Age 2 for the DS.  There's nothing wrong with keeping your mind fit, right?  I may be taking the day to sit around and not do terribly much, but at least I'm doing something good for me.

I think that's one thing everyone seems to forget about healthy living.  Living healthy doesn't mean eating healthy and staying active every single day.  There's always room for a chill day here and there, and it helps to balance out physical stimulation with plenty of mental stimulation.  We work so hard on eating balanced diets to maintain our own health, but we don't look at how other aspects of our lives balance out.  Sure, physical activity is healthy and great for the body, but without stimulating the mind you can easily live out a stereotype.  Physically fit and active people aren't known for being particularly brilliant.  Still, a strong and healthy mind can research more efficiently, something essential for anyone who wants to live a healthier lifestyle as data is constantly changing, think more clearly, and make more intelligent decisions.  Keeping our mind active means having a better ability to think quick.

What about video games?  They're just mindless entertainment, right?  Well, some games truly are.  Some games are just about killing the bad guy with no sense of strategy or memorizing the combination of buttons for that really cool move.  Yes, memorizing a combination will help the memory, but that's not what I'm talking about.  Puzzle games keep you stimulated and active.  Games with complex story lines and things to figure out often keep players thinking, which is good for training the mind.  Puzzle games are the perfect example of this.

Even those "mindless" games have their place and use.  Sometimes it's nice just to kick back and relax, especially when life is stressful.  Playing something mindless can be just what it takes to release the stress from a long and tiring day.  It can be a way to take your mind off of things to come back to it later with more clarity.  Yes, meditation is also a way to do this, but not everyone genuinely enjoys meditation.  Video games and "mindless" diversions can also become a social activity, something that meditation really isn't, fulfilling the human need for social interaction.

Cold days like these are perfect for kicking back and relaxing.  We always used to say we were sitting at home, trying to stay warm.  Personally, I think of it more like having a low-key day.  I can focus on working on my computer, doing some relaxing things, maybe even curling up with a book or my knitting later on.  I might even be really daring and take a nap!

Healing from a Painful Past

This whole thing with being healthy kind of amuses me.  So many people choose to live the healthy lifestyle in action, but in truth, they just don't get it.  They eat healthy foods.  They take care of their bodies.  They use green products and try to do their part to care for the Earth.  Unfortunately, they don't really take the time to look at all aspects of their lives.  Often times vital points are forgotten, most noticeably, spirituality and emotional health.

I have to admit, I'm a person that's suffered trauma.  Who isn't these days?  Everyone has some kind of painful emotionally trying baggage of their past.  All to many people claim they've healed from it by just ignoring it, or worse, denying it ever existed.  Instead of taking the steps to recover and become whole again, they simply look to all the things they can control in their lives.

Isn't it funny that health nuts tend to be the most common people to ignore their past rather than dealing with it?  This is also the demographic that seems to have the highest percentage of people who choose to deal with those painful experiences from their past.  It's really one extreme or the other with this group!

On the outside a lot of these people who ignore the painful past tend to look like well adjusted happy individuals on the outside.  They make a good effort to look so put together.  They seem to have the model family, but just a little bit of getting to them reveals the horrible truth.  They're really carrying this painful past with them and aren't really as put together as they seem.

Thankfully, I'm starting to surround myself with those people who really are put together and committed to working pas the things in their own pasts that they wish to change.  It's a beautiful thing, to see the people you care about as healthy and whole individuals.  It's inspirational to pick up and keep on working for change.

The latest convert to this way of thinking is my own partner.  I've known he's been hiding something for a while.  It's started to come between us.  Our relationship got so bad recently that we couldn't even sleep in the same bed together.  We were on the fast track to a break up.  Finally, after talking to my friend over at Otherwise Quite Good, I decided to talk to him, figure out where our problems were, and if we were just pulling on each other to work towards different goals.  If the paths of our lives were going in two different directions, why try anymore?  We needed to figure out where we were going from here.

As it turns out, his past was still haunting him to the point where it was starting to interfere with our happiness.  He didn't want to deal with the baggage he was holding on to because he thought it was too scary for him.  It was intimidating, understandably, and he wasn't sure how to ask for help.  He wasn't sure what the next step was.  All he knew was being broken wasn't working for him, and I was getting too close.  Once someone got beyond the surface, he'd be forced to deal with it, and he didn't think he could.  Getting too close meant he wanted to run away.  We were to the point of being ready to call our relationship off when he confessed what was really bothering him.  He's now decided he's ready to take it one step at a time rather than hiding away from it all and making the hard choice to be alone in life.

It's never an easy road for anyone, but the end result is definitely worth the challenges.  We're going to work through this so we can both be happier and healthier in body, mind, and spirit.  If this road ends with taking different paths in our lives, that's what it will be.  However, we'll at least know what is taking us down different roads is nothing more than our own life path.  It won't be a decision made by the baggage we both carry with us.