Exhaustion and the Reset Button

I think my baby is trying to give me a message.  For the past few weeks he's made it difficult to sleep in my own bed.  He seems to want to sleep in a room alone.  The moment anyone else enters, he's awake.  This means if I sleep on the couch, I'm fine.  If I try to sleep in my bed, I end up spending the whole night up trying to get him back to sleep.  It's been rough on all of us.

Last night things kind of got to the point where no one could really deal with it.  Thankfully the older kids were able to sleep through it, but the little one woke up and did nothing but scream no matter what we did for two hours!  By the time we finally did get him to sleep, my partner and I were arguing because we were both so tired, stressed, and exhausted.  It got to the point where he stormed out, waking up the baby again, and I finally gave up and got out of bed to start looking for work.  I was half convinced he wasn't going to come back when he finally came in.  We talked things out briefly, and I went to bed.

I have to say, sleep was more blissful than any I've had in a while.  I only got a couple of hours, but it was better than nothing.  I was sent back to bed for a nap because I needed one, but I couldn't really sleep for more than a few minutes at a time with my partner being on the phone with his dad and later his mom.  We've figured out what part of his problem finding a job.  His mom messed up his credit pretty severely, so I couldn't just relax while he was talking that out with her.  It's probably for the best since it would completely mess up my sleep cycle again.

I think I have to thank my little baby boy.  He's really setting the reset button on my sleep patterns.  I'm so exhausted that I could probably sleep if I went to bed right now.  I'm not going to because it's still a bit early for that.  If I start that pattern I'm never going to be able to stay up for dance classes, but at least I know when I go to bed, I'll actually be tired and I might just find a way to sleep.

Today's Wisdom Card?  "There is a solution to every problem."  Yeah, I've had to keep reminding myself of this one.  "We create habits and problems to fulfill a need.  When I can find a positive way to fill the need, I can release the problem."  I honestly think I need to start looking at some of the needs in my life that are causing problems.  I need to reassess how I handle those needs.  For example, my biggest problem is the sleep thing.  I have a need for my mind to be active so I can handle everything I have on my plate.  Unfortunately, not sleeping is creating more of a problem in itself.   I need to remind myself that being well rested is the best way I can help myself think my way through the other list of problems I'm having right now.

Today's I Can Do It Card reads, "The joy I find in my career is reflected in my overall happiness."  I suppose that one is an interesting statement right now!  I'm not sure how much joy I'm feeling in my career!  "I have unlimited potential.  Only good lies before me."  Okay, this one I need to post to every surface I look at regularly.  That way I can remind myself of it all the time!